Quick answer: Autism is often under-diagnosed in women and girls because early research and diagnostic criteria were based on boys, and girls are socialised to mask. Roughly 1 in 4 boys are diagnosed for every 1 in 16 girls. In women, autism more often shows as masking, internalised anxiety or depression, and intense sensory sensitivity, with burnout sometimes only visible after years of coping. Soft, tag-free, breathable clothing can reduce daily sensory stress.
Hey, it's Aunt Julie, back with another blog post discussing the uncomfortable truths we face as women, breaking down stigma and fostering understanding, after all, knowledge is power.
In April, we celebrate World Autism Acceptance Month, although I wonder if we shouldn't rename it World Autism Understanding Month, as there is still much we don't know about autism, especially when it comes to how it presents in women and girls.
What is autism?
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a neurodevelopmental condition most commonly characterised by social challenges, such as interacting with other people, struggling to empathise, adhering to routines, and finding bright lights and loud noises especially jarring. Many stats suggest that 1 in 100 children are diagnosed with ASD. A study via the U.S. National Library of Medicine highlights the gender diagnostic gap, reporting that roughly 1 in 4 boys compared to 1 in 16 girls received a diagnosis, illustrating how girls may be under-identified even though both sexes are equally susceptible. The book The Lost Girls of Autism describes how autism was initially believed to be a male condition, so screening was geared towards autistic male tendencies.
How it shows up in boys versus girls
When we think of autistic people, we look for common themes such as avoiding eye contact, being quiet or non-verbal, repeating phrases, repetitive movements (stimming), difficulty with social skills, and finding certain textures or types of clothing unbearable, all common in young boys and fitting the traditional profile. It's often overlooked in young girls and explained away as shyness or excitability. Due to social conditioning, girls are much more likely to internalise their struggles, leading to anxiety, depression and late diagnosis, and are taught the skills to accurately mask their social struggles, which is why one of the largest social indicators of autism is so often missed in girls.
The autistic experience in later life
Having learnt to mask from a very young age, it's no wonder that 1 girl is diagnosed for every 4 boys. The effects can be profound when we consider the alienation, confusion, sensitivity and dysphoria many autistic women experience. It will often come at the expense of a woman's final breaking point, where the mask slips, burnout hits, and women retreat into themselves. Overstimulation is not linear, it can build to a tipping point: a dripping tap while someone talks to you, a changed plan, or being able to feel a seam on your clothes. JulieMay has had countless messages from people who finally found freedom from painful, dysregulating underwear, because all our lingerie is designed for the most sensitive skin, including people who have sensory issues and need garments that won't dig, rub, scratch or feel claustrophobic, like our Rosie Silk & Organic Cotton Lace Full Cup Wireless Bra.
Healing and self-understanding
Social media popularising ASD has given space for more people to explore the possibility of a diagnosis and seek support, and driven research into what autism looks like in women and girls. Learning to regulate your nervous system before burnout is vital, that means learning tools and techniques, sharing your needs with friends and family, and even simple changes like what bra you wear. Autism is not a disorder to be ashamed of. With bountiful boldness, Aunt Julie x
Please note: this article shares lived experience and general information, not medical advice. If you think you or someone you love may be autistic, your GP can talk you through assessment and support options.
Overstimulated in winter layers? How neurodivergent women can stay comfortable
The constant wintertime dance between freezing pavements and overheated indoor spaces can feel like whiplash for neurodivergent women, especially when every extra layer brings new textures, pressures and temperature swings your nervous system has to manage. Maybe it's a wool jumper that feels like sandpaper, the weight of a coat that suddenly feels suffocating, or just too many layers at once.
Why winter makes sensory overload worse
According to the American Psychological Association, exteroception is sensitivity to stimuli that are outside the body. This heightened awareness of temperature, pressure and texture can be exhausting for autistic and ADHD individuals: tight sleeves can feel like they're clamping down, heavy coats may feel suffocating, and walking from icy air into blasting indoor heat can send the nervous system into overdrive.
Common winter clothing triggers
- Texture overload from scratchy wool, bulky seams, stiff fabrics and irritating linings.
- Pressure sensitivity from tight sleeves, snug waistbands, heavy coats or too-tight bra bands.
- Overheating from synthetic layers that trap warmth and prevent airflow.
- Irritation from tags, seams, elastic or static.
- Sudden temperature changes, like moving from freezing air into overheated shops.
How to choose clothing that won't overstimulate
Prioritise tag-free construction, seamless or flat-stitched designs, soft natural fibres like cotton, bamboo, silk and Tencel, and adjustable or flexible fits. Don't buy multiples before testing at home, choose aesthetics over comfort, or assume soft always equals sensory-friendly. At JulieMay, our organic cotton and pure silk blend is naturally breathable, soft and hypoallergenic, tag-free and non-restrictive, with wire-free or cotton-wrapped wires, plus pull-over and front-zipping bras as adaptive-friendly options.
Frequently asked questions
Why is autism so often missed in women and girls?
Early autism research focused on boys, so diagnostic criteria were shaped around how autism presents in males. Girls are also socialised to mask, so signs are frequently explained away as shyness, leading to late or missed diagnosis.
How does autism present differently in women?
Many autistic women mask in social situations, internalise difficulties (which can look like anxiety or depression), and experience intense sensory sensitivity, with burnout and meltdowns sometimes only becoming visible after years of coping.
Can clothing really affect sensory overload?
Yes. Seams, tags, tight bands and scratchy fabrics can be genuine sensory triggers, and winter layering amplifies them. Soft, breathable, tag-free natural fibres can reduce daily sensory stress.
How do I get an autism assessment in the UK?
Start by speaking to your GP, who can refer you for an assessment. The National Autistic Society and similar organisations offer information and peer support.
Last updated: June 2026.
